Water

I'm going to be completely honest -- today started out terrible, completely and utterly terrible. Right now I am assigned to a project at work that requires that I make mass changes to our User's access. With these changes comes unexpected errors and issues in the system we use, SAP. I am also responsible for fixing these errors when they occur, which means I am constantly putting out fires and bearing the brunt of frustration that the User's have. My phone rings off the hook, my office communicator is constantly pinging and my email is seriously out of control. And as you might have guessed, people are never happy when reporting these issues... This morning started with another one of those fires and a ranting User who decided to copy everyone in the company (or so it seemed) just to get one issue resolved. I really don't know how people think I can resolve an issue any faster when 10 people bitch at me about vs. 1. Anyway, that's beside the point, and there is a real point to this...I'm not just venting. Really! With the morning quickly fading I was worried that I was going to be "forced" to skip class (again) as I had to ensure that everyone was up and running smoothly. 10:40 hit and I decided I was going no matter what; I was tired of work obligations stealing from my personal interests. And it didn't hurt that we've been watching a film that had sucked me in completely. The film is called Water and it is directed by Deepa Mehta. The story is a true account of what the widows of India have endured over time and some still do today. There is a lot of attention placed on Ghandi's Peace Movement as well. When I left work, I felt like I could lose it at any moment, and after watching the ending of this film, I remembered what kinds of things are really worth getting upset over and what really matters. I was also reminded about the "better" way to live. I don't live like most of my co-workers -- I don't want to either. I try not to just do things out of self-interest, I try to do things for the greater good, but I think I could do a better job at that, nonetheless. When I think about true despair in the world, my worries seem so much less. When I think about the harsh realities in the world, past and present, I wonder how we can let these things happen. How do we make excuses or turn a blind eye to something so terrible for so long? I think about when people notice something isn't right with someone and they say, "Someone should do something." What they are really saying is, "Someone other than myself should do something." And why is this? What do we really lose by going out on a limb and saying something, offering support, asking if things are really ok? People die every day and people say that they knew someone, they offer kind remarks at a funeral, but how many people really know that someone? How many people understand what that person truly battled? The poem I posted yesterday is about that very thing. People aren't what they seem, there are cries for help, but people only see what they want to see-- what's convienant. I think people, self-serving, egotistical people, in general are what are irking me right now and I'm surrounded by them every day. My outlook is jaded and I'm currently an inconvienant person, but my resolve is strengthening, this I can tell.