Bibliophile

In the next few years, I hope to be buying a house. This time around, I'm not settling when it comes to built-ins. My most desired attraction in a house are walls of built-in book cases. My style is "books." I don't want them to cover every wall, unless of course I have my own library (which is probably pretty unrealistic at this point in my life) but I do want a little book cove. At least 2 intersecting walls of a room dedicated to my prized posessions. And if I can't find a house with the right built-ins, I guess I'll just have to hire someone to come in and make them for me.

All this reading and book talk has me thinking I need to be writing too. I know, I know. Just a little bit longer and I'll have graduated and have that pretty piece of paper that so many employers want. If I do manage to pull off graduation in December 09 (which is still the plan) I will have much more free time to be creative. Right now, it's really hard to think of stories, poems, or even things that are aesthetically pleasing, when I have to balance work/school/responsibilities. But that's soooo going to change when I'm done. And when I've finally figured out how to create a career out of the things I'm good at and love at the same time. One step in that direction is putting myself "out" there. There are a couple local publications that I could submit to, I should submit to, but I have no time and no energy. I will get there though, just you wait and see.

So the agenda for this evening? Well, since I'm still ill with something Josh referred to as the plague over lunch, I'm spending the evening watching Penelope. I was reading up on Mark Ryden because his business address is in Denver, CO ,and I was thinking maybe his gallery was too (it's not), I discovered something from this movie was inspired by some of his art. So I thought I better check it out. Actually, now that I think about it, it has Christina Ricci and if anyone ever looked like they stepped out of a Mark Ryden painting, it's her. And besides, I'm too scared to watch Supernatural on my own anyway.

Sick of being sick

I'm sick again. To be truthful, I've been sick for nearly 3 weeks but Monday things took a turn for the worst. I know that I haven't done a very good job resting with the crazy schedule that I've been keeping and added stress at work is certainly not helping anything. I decided to work from home today so I could at least lay around in my pjs and properly stuff kleenex up my nose to keep the drippage out of my way. I came to several conclusions while working 1) I am much more productive when I'm not at work and 2) I'm much happier when I'm not at work 3) I think I'd rather be sick at home than be healthy at work. Do you see a trend here? Yeah, me too.

This evening I finished up Miguel Street by V.S. Naipaul. It's certainly not something I would have picked up on my own, but was actually pretty good. The novel is put together like a collection of short stories that are built off different characters, which could stand alone. The endings to each story were a bit bleak and unsettling but very realistic (and this was based on the author's childhood so that makes sense). There are some pretty humorous parts of the book but there is quite a lot that I found depressing too -- especially how the women and children were treated on Miguel Street. The novel definitely gives great insight into life in a poverty-stricken Trinidad as seen through the eyes of a young boy and told in the words of his older self. I give the book 3/4.

The other thing I did tonight was think about what I could do for myself this weekened (or the rest of the week because I'm not letting work take over my life this week, it's a vow I've made to myself). Realizing that I'm probably not going to be 100% by Saturday, and even if I was, I should just take it easy and get rid of this crud once and for all, I thought about cooking. Geez, I'm in such a cooking mood. There are a couple of things that I've wanted to make for weeks now that I just haven't gotten to: Chai muffins w/ chai mousse, Corn Chowder, and homemade pizza. The homemade pizza involves a little more than popping a Boboli in the oven with some canned sauce and toppings. I want to try out a new crust recipe, make my own sanuce and do it up with fresh mozzarella and basil or canadian bacon and green chili (one of my fav's). So maybe this weekend will be a cooking weekend, and if I don't feel up to something, I just don't cook.

April weekend in KC

I had a nice long weekend (thanks to Good Friday) so Josh and I decided to go to KC. Actually, Josh attempted to suprise me with a trip to KC but I got it out of him. Friday I spent running a bunch of errands and shopping. I bought new outfits for the girls and Josh -- they all looked very cute. Saturday morning we left for KC. We first hit the new Zona Rosa shopping center. I wasn't all that impressed with it. It did have a Sephora but everything was spread out and still under construction. We had lunch at this chinese place called Bo-Lings. We were both unimpressed as it was really very bland- even down to the crab rangoon which I love. We also shopped at Legends and I really liked this mall. It was outside and had some really nice shops. We stopped in at the Converse store and bought the girls each a pair of chucks. I found a few things - some jeans, pj pants, etc. For dinner we went to The Cheesecake Factory in Overland Park. We only had a 20 min wait, which is so much better than the wait in the Plaza. We had calamari (which is my favo

rite). Josh had these cajun chicken things and I had a cuban sandwich. We couldn't finish our meals and we had to get cheesecake to go. We both ordered this peanut butter fudge ripple thing which was way too rich and neither of us could finish our meal. This morning we hit up Half-Priced Books which is a great bookstore. I found such good deals, I couldn't stop myself. I walked out with these titles and I only paid $1-$3 a book:

The Road by Cormac McCarthy

Hypocrite in a Pouffy White Dress by Susan Jane Gilman

Balzac and the Little Chinese Seamstress by Dai Sijie

Bait and Switch by Barbara Ehrenreich

The Glass Castle by Jeanette Walls -- I've really been wanting to read this one!

A Million Little Pieces by James Fry - I started this but I don't have a copy anymore so I had to buy one!

The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger - Yes, this is one of my favorite books and no I didn't have copy, now I do!

The Heart is a Lonely Hunter by Carson McCullers

Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides

Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Girlbert - Another one I've really been wanting!

The History of Love by Nicole Krauss

The Mermaid Chair by Sue Monk Kidd

And my total was: $25.00 - Can you believe this!?!?

Seriously, go check out this bookstore. Josh also got a few books as well. We had Einstein Bros. for breakfast and then headed to Dave & Busters to play some games. I kicked Josh's butt at Skee-ball -- turns out all my practice online really was doing me some good. We discovered the Deal or No Deal Game, which was just like the gameshow. I think the show is pretty silly but playing for tickets is pretty intense and we had fun. Afterwards we had some Fuddruckers and headed back to Wichita. On the way back I read 4 chapters of The Picture of Dorian Gray aloud to Josh. It made the trip fly by and we both really enjoyed it -- I know, we are nerds. We finished the evening off by watching 4 episodes of Supernatural. The show is still holding my interest so that's a good sign. All in all it was a fantastic weekend. Here is a pic of Josh at Bo-Lings looking pretty darn cute; it's the only time I remembered to use my camera this weekend, go figure.

Quotable

Things you probably shouldn't stay in an All-Staff Town Hall Meeting at the corporate office:

They still show a profit. We are producing what I like to call " a couple turds in a punch bowl."

~CEO.

Porphyria's Lover

I finished Haroun and the Sea of Stories tonight. I give it 3.5/4 stars. It was a fantastic book and something I would want to share with my own kids one day. It would be a perfect one-chapter-before-bed kind of story to share with little ones who love books. I think it has a bit of a "Big Fish" & "What Dreams May Come" kind of vibe, both of which are wonderful films.

I also read some Robert Browning in class today. One of the poems we read, I really enjoyed so I thought I would share it:

Porphyria's Lover

THE rain set early in to-night,
The sullen wind was soon awake,
It tore the elm-tops down for spite,
And did its worst to vex the lake:
I listen'd with heart fit to break.
When glided in Porphyria; straight
She shut the cold out and the storm,
And kneel'd and made the cheerless grate
Blaze up, and all the cottage warm;
Which done, she rose, and from her form
Withdrew the dripping cloak and shawl,
And laid her soil'd gloves by, untied
Her hat and let the damp hair fall,
And, last, she sat down by my side
And call'd me. When no voice replied,
She put my arm about her waist,
And made her smooth white shoulder bare,
And all her yellow hair displaced,
And, stooping, made my cheek lie there,
And spread, o'er all, her yellow hair,
Murmuring how she loved me—she
Too weak, for all her heart's endeavour,
To set its struggling passion free
From pride, and vainer ties dissever,
And give herself to me for ever.
But passion sometimes would prevail,
Nor could to-night's gay feast restrain
A sudden thought of one so pale
For love of her, and all in vain:
So, she was come through wind and rain.
Be sure I look'd up at her eyes
Happy and proud; at last I knew
Porphyria worshipp'd me; surprise
Made my heart swell, and still it grew
While I debated what to do.
That moment she was mine, mine, fair,
Perfectly pure and good: I found
A thing to do, and all her hair
In one long yellow string I wound
Three times her little throat around,
And strangled her. No pain felt she;
I am quite sure she felt no pain.
As a shut bud that holds a bee,
I warily oped her lids: again
Laugh'd the blue eyes without a stain.
And I untighten'd next the tress
About her neck; her cheek once more
Blush'd bright beneath my burning kiss:
I propp'd her head up as before,
Only, this time my shoulder bore
Her head, which droops upon it still:
The smiling rosy little head,
So glad it has its utmost will,
That all it scorn'd at once is fled,
And I, its love, am gain'd instead!
Porphyria's love: she guess'd not how
Her darling one wish would be heard.
And thus we sit together now,
And all night long we have not stirr'd,
And yet God has not said a word!

Why do I like this poem? Several reasons. First, Browning is a Victorian writer and it was so not pc to talk about how you want to kill someone -- in other words he gives voice to the inner psyche and that hadn't been done before. Second, I kind of giggle about the idea but this really is about a Victorian era bootycall gone awry! Third, I relate it to Self Esteem by Offspring and Last Dance with Mary Jane by Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers. I'm thinking my next paper will be over this poem in particular and I might even do a comparison against some of these modern song lyrics.

Reason # 5,617: I have the best boyfriend in the world

Why do you ask? Because Josh suprised me at 7:30 this morning with a Starbucks grande chai latte and 2 maple & bacon donuts from The Donut Whole! Oh yes! I've been whining about wanting to try this donut for months now and Josh delivered them to my doorstep. They are seriously good and I can't stop thinking about them. Jealous much?

Online therapy

Today was a trying day -- people can make my job very difficult at times and as much as I want to please everyone, it's just not possible-- I'm not perfect. I told myself I was too tired to blog tonight but I find that if I just take a few moments to take my mind off work, school, and responsibilities, I can relax/sleep easier. So tonight I found something pretty cool -- online Skee-ball! It's seriously addictive. And just so you know, I am much better at online skee-ball than I am at the real thing.

I had read about Omegle the other day so I thought I would try just to see, here is how it went:

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: i got the hots for you
You: u don't know me
Stranger: so what.
Stranger: i can't have the hots for a stranger?
You: are you bi?
Stranger: you know, i don't have the hots for someone so closeminded.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I don't think I'll return to Omegle unless it's to vent to strangers and say weird things - which could be therapeutic...ha ha.